No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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