it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
