who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
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