theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
