you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize