I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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