Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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