so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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