Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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