I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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