id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Randomize