just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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