i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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