I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize