so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize