hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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