words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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