Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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