I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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