While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Randomize