After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Randomize