ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
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I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
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It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize