ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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