I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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