He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Randomize
