Her vagina should come with caution tape.
My balls are so social today.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
