They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
