me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize