in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
