Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
