i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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