I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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