This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....