I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
My breasts were aching with rage.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.