my phone needs a breathalizer
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
how does that bad decision feel?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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