Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
