Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Randomize
