Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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