he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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