He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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