i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
