i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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