Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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