I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
