I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
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