I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
