It's just like the Real World with babies
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
