well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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