Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
