yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
