WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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