hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
