So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
